Elon Musk & Autism as a Shield Against Accountability

First, let me start by saying that I was formally diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) at 18, which at the time was known as Aspergers. I write this criticism as someone who has had to address much of the behavior I am going to address in this piece.

Elon Musk is perhaps the best known public figure with ASD today. As he has aligned with MAGA, and more specifically Curtis Yarvin’s dark enlightenment movement, he has posted more and more extreme rhetoric and engaged in behavior which undermines not only his public image but his multi-billion dollar brands.

Musk engages in a sort of shamelessness that he often excuses because of his autism. He refuses to take any accountability for his behavior, and often posts without a filter or any apparent self-awareness. He even blamed a sieg-heil salute at Trump’s inauguration on flapping and stimming (a restless behavior exhibited by many on the spectrum). Not only is this offensive, it is outrageous.

Musk has weaponized his autism as the ultimate excuse to evade accountability for his behavior. I can even relate to this, because for many years in my twenties and early 30s, I did this too. I would post without a filter, engage in obsessive fixations, and outcomes, and proceeded through life online (and off) without any effort at self awareness. When I realized later on how these posts, thoughts and behaviors could be received, I would simply use my autism as a shield against accountability: this is just the way I am! I didn’t want to do the work.

That’s absolutely unacceptable. I am an adult, Elon is an adult. Adults, regardless their diagnosis, take accountability for their behavior and take actions to address it. In my own case, I hit rock bottom around 2018 and began the slow and arduous work in therapy with a renowned autism expert, and remained honest with that therapist, in order to better understand my behavior and avoid committing similar patterns of negative actions and thoughts. Today I often appear on her panels to patients, therapists and policy makers world-wide to talk about the work that we have done together as she considers me one of her most successful patients. Let me remind you that this took years of hard work and above all else, honesty. I have had to learn to read the room, to develop a filter, and to think beyond myself. Buddhism has also helped me both in sobriety and accepting the present, without a negative fixation on disappointment or when we cannot control a situation. I have learned to let things go.

Like Elon Musk and his abuse of stimulants, my drug of choice was alcohol. Many on the spectrum wind up with substance abuse problems to mask their deep hurt in trying to navigate a neurotypical world which has often rejected them. Those substances create a false confidence, but in the end they only serve to amplify the worst behaviors. I cannot tell you how many times I would go out, party, and post something dumb on my blog. I never stopped in the moment to filter myself, or think outside of my own impulsive need for attention. I cost myself opportunities and relationships with people I cared deeply about. I scared people away because I was not a healthy person. As of writing, I am sober for close to a year with absolutely no desire to ever turn back because I treat alcohol like a food allergy, I accept I can never drink again. I don’t want to ever drink again.

When a high profile figure like Musk normalizes and even cloaks his entire identity in “autism super powers” he encourages his litany of followers to engage in the same lack of accountability and bad behavior. ASD can be a super power. Many of us are extremely intelligent, even MENSA (an organization I still refuse to join despite eligibility for reasons I won’t get into). But if we don’t address our bad behavior, all that doesn’t matter. If we cannot read the room, and get out of our own way, we cannot live up to our full potential. I certainly didn’t. I rushed through things, half-assing work, and expected to just coast to opportunity because I felt I was the smartest person in the room. Even if I was, it didn’t matter because that alone is not enough for success. Now after many years of self-improvement, therapy and spiritual stability, I am focused in a way I have never been in my life. I got out of my own way, I learned self-awareness and now I can read a room like a body language expert. I can read people like a book, because I learned this skill studying a book and by listening to feedback. It’s not how most people learn intuition and awareness, but I learned it nonetheless. I had to. I was no longer willing to make excuses for my behavior. So I changed it.

High functioning Autism is a super power, just look at any list of suspected and diagnosed public figures throughout history and you will see some of the most celebrated names in their given professions. But none of that is possible without first addressing behaviors that cost us opportunities. Let go of the arrogance and need for approval. Musk continues to crash out of companies, mislead others, and stumbles through life without any accountability. For a while I committed the same sins of misbehavior. These traits can only be ripe for success if we first become the best version of ourselves. I hope Musk and others can find the will do to the work, because you will be that much more powerful if you do. We don’t need to define ourselves by our diagnosis, we need to outgrow the need to do that and hold ourselves accountable like an adult.

Lastly, I am on my forgiveness tour now. I don’t know if people that I have hurt or pushed away in the past will forgive me or give me another chance. I certainly don’t feel entitled to anyone’s time or energy. Regardless of whether I am forgiven or afforded another chance in my new and evolved state, I must still do the work. I must do that work for myself to achieve what I know is possible for me. I believe in myself this time, because I no longer make excuses. I will achieve my goals because I am happy and healthy now. I wish that for anyone who has struggled with ASD.